Combining Diamond Rings with Baseball Diamonds
12. Mar, 2010 
9 Comments
For every Little League boy who is dreaming of making it to the major leagues, there are two Barbie-lovin’ girls who are hoping to date a boy who will make it to the major leagues. Of course, the odds of that happening are incredibly low… for either gender.
I find it completely understandable that these young lads envision a day when they will see their name in lights and hear their name being cheered by thousands of fans as they come up to the plate. However, I am still trying to figure out why so many women fall asleep each night, hoping that their prince charming… a man in cleats, carrying a baseball bat… will come rescue them.
However, many five-year-old girls fail to realize is the reality regarding baseball. The long season, the constant travel – one can only imagine how hard this would be on the princess waiting at home.
Let’s take the Toronto Blue Jays upcoming season, for example. If I can still add (it’s been a few years since high school math), the Blue Jays will spend approximately 88 days in Toronto during their 187 game season. Plus, that’s not everything…consider where they are right at this moment… in Florida – for six weeks!
That being the case, it doesn’t seem to leave much time for baseball players to actually be the prince charming their woman has longed for when they are younger.
And then there’s the aspect of relocation. Whether the baseball player is excitedly moving from farm team to the major leagues, or disappointedly being traded from his home team to another state, (or in the case of our Blue Jays – to another country), one can only imagine how heart-wrenching the experience is for the woman he is leaving at home. She is merely left behind to figure out their new living situation and forced to say goodbye to the house they made their own, to the friends they’ve grown attached to, and to the happy life they had
The reality of the artificial dream is acknowledged in a newspaper article from the Montreal Gazette. Although published over 25 years ago (1985). The reality still rings true today. Within the article, Bryn Smith, who had then been a pitcher for the Montreal Expos, stated:
You can shag a fly as easily in Wrigley Field as the Big O. It’s the person at home cooking those meals whose world has really been turned around. While her husband is doing something he’s always dreamt of, she has been uprooted from friends and family to find herself in a position she probably never dreamed of being.
Evidently Smith realized the effects of falling in love with a baseball player.
For every game that has to be won, a birthday is missed. For every RBI scored, an anniversary is missed. For every loss that occurs, a player’s love says goodnight to an empty pillow. For every win that takes place, tears of happiness are shared by the male but tears of sadness are expressed knowing it won’t be long until her lover leaves again.
Kate Kilpatrick published an article highlighting the reality of it all in the Washington Post this past August. In the article, Rachel Dunn, wife of Adam Dunn, the first baseman for the Nationals, stated that a life of the significant other of a baseball player is “not even remotely as glamorous as people think – [as it] can be lonely, chaotic and uncertain.”
Abby Kearns, wife of Nationals right fielder Austin Kearns, reiterated Dunn’s statement claiming “I am lucky to be able to take a shower every day. I’m just so busy, honestly, trying to take care of the kids, without [Austin] here.”
Michael Schlact, who is presently playing for the Texas Rangers, discusses the hardship that arises from being in love with a woman and a sport with me through a direct message Twitter. Schlact indicated: “I’m blessed that my wife is able to travel with me [now]. [It] makes it much easier. We did long distance for 3 years. It was hard!”
Interestingly, when I asked Toronto Blue Jays, Dirk Hayhurst, (or otherwise known by his Twitter friends as “The Garfoose,” about the aspect of the dream women have of falling in love with a baseball player (and the affect that might have on him), Hayhurst merely indicated that “women that want to meet you because of what you do for a living are not the type worth meeting.”
Evidently, it seems the life that I dreamed of having at five-years-old now doesn’t seem to be as amazing as I had once thought. The dream house I dreamed of sharing, only hear the echo from movements, the dream kids I’d wish to have would be screaming through crowded airports, the dream job I wished to hold would be pushed aside due to her being given the roles of both a mother and a father, and the dream husband that I wished would always be there to protect me be my knight and shining armour…well he’s away, playing the dream sport.
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A pretty accurate summary of all pro sports really. If you even look at WWE wrestlers; they’re on the road 300+ days a year, not exactly condusive of a strong family life, especially if you’re not one of the top money making guys.
When I was playing hockey in Europe, I was engaged, and my fiance was in Canada. Sometimes the phone (and internet now) becomes your only window back to your relationship. Sometimes if you’re only a few towns away, you might as well be on the other side of the planet.
Sure the payoff of pro sports of big, but some people are just better equipped to handle the travel vs. family life faceoff than others.
Thanks Dave for your comments.
Let me begin with – YOU WERE PLAYING HOCKEY IN EUROPE?!?! holy!
Secondly, I like you said, all pro-athletes go through the same scenario. But I guess that is why love matters. If you can make it through that, you can make it through anything.
I recently read a similar blog regarding the hardship of athletes and relationships. It is featured here:
http://www.hetoreahamstring.me.uk/blog/?p=567
In fact, during the article, Sports, Tabloids and Hypocrisy, Rohan discusses the reality of sports players lifes.
It’s a very interesting read, check it out if you are interested.
April, that is a really well researched and written article that I really enjoyed. You’re instantly credible through speaking to appropriate sources.
No doubting that ‘groupies’ are global, and that Rachel Dunn’s description of a life that is ‘lonely, chaotic and uncertain’ is not far off the mark.
Thank you for commenting on my post. I really look forward to reading more of your posts.
Rohan,
Thanks for your feedback! I appreciate your compliments and as well look forward to reading more of your work as well.
Hey April,
This is a great topic! We always seem to focus on the stars themselves and not whose helping in the background. We see these players as well off individuals but we never get to see what’s going on at home. So yes great article for sure!
Great quote from Hayhurst. He seems like one of the genuinely good guys in the game. How’s that for alliteration?
James,
Thank you so much for your comment! It’s very true that we do not realize the indepth truth of what actually takes place in baseball players lives! Thanks again for your feedback!
Callum,
As a previous English Major, I love the alliteration! And Dirk is one amazing guy. There have many people that I have “met” on Twitter that are involved in the baseball organization that has enabled me to realize that baseball players are just people living their dream, they are normal people with the same goals and aspirations. For this reason, their kindness and gratitude shouldn’t shock me, but it always does. Thanks again for your comment.