A Day At The Theatre (Part 3)

I felt it necessary to remove the Up In The Air review as well as the Daybreakers one I had planned. My reasoning behind this is that everyone seems to already have an opinion on Daybreakers due to the love/hate relationship audiences have with vampires right now. And I read the novel Up In The Air, and the movie is nothing special.

The Lovely Bones:

Considering the last movie I saw directed (and written) by Peter Jackson was Braindead. And if you ever came across that little film then you will know my expectations were very low for The Lovely Bones. On the official Stoner Movie List this movie ranked 8.9/10, which makes it just above Pineapple Express, and putting it below Dogma. And personally I loved this film. The effects were spectacular and the acting was spot-on for the characters of the book the film was based on. The one thing that kept me entertained while watching it was the concept of the afterlife (or the ‘in between’) and how mindboggling and chaotic it seemed with its ability to act like an anti-reality where anything happens all the time (as confusing as that is).

It captured the one thing I always try to look for in films and that’s my sixth sense. When a character walks on screen and you feel a wave of creepiness and indecision about them, that is what I look for and that is what Stanley Tucci did. Tucci basically plays the character of a man who comes into the life of Suzie Salmon (Saoirse Ronan) by becoming obsessed with her. He eventually captures and kills Suzie Salmon and we (the audience) go on a journey into the lives of Suzie in the afterlife, her family dealing with her death and the sad life of George Harvey (Tucci).

The story was excellent and the screenplay definitely well written. The sometimes lack of dialogue was actually annoying as I tried to get as much information as possible from what they were saying because of how interesting the story was. I’ve been back to the theatre three times now to see this film and I plan on seeing it a few more times. It’s well put together, well developed (both in characters and story) and the cinematography is top of the line. The only unfortunate part of the film was when I left the theatre and stepped into Legion.

Edit: Some people found this movie sad and a few even cried during it. I really didn’t see it as a sad movie, but a journey into the theme of grief in individuals and the exploration of the idea of the soul. Philosophical, not sad.

Legion:

My reaction after the movie: “So wait…what happened?” And pretty much I can sum up the film in those few words. What happened? To be honest I don’t really know. How I can properly explain this movie is to give a brief analogy. Imagine taking a book and ripping out the first chapter, doing the same with the middle of the book, but only taking every odd (instead of even) chapter. Now put the book back together and throw the ending in the fire.

No wait, better way of explaining it. They took a picture of Paul Bettany looking at the sky, added wings and a knife, a clearly photoshoped MP5K (that’s a gun) and some fancy lighting. Scott Stewart (the director) saw the picture on someone’s desktop and said, “Hey, I can make a movie out of that”. And KABLAMO I give you Legion.

My apologies, I’m ranting a little bit. I was the one defending the film as I walked out of the theatre. I defended its 100% action, zero story as I did when I walked out of Transformers 2. We didn’t need story, we needed action, right? Wrong. This wasn’t directed by Michael bay and it wasn’t written by any modern day Shakespeare either.

This film was poorly written, badly directed, included a slew of nameless actors and a smattering of wrongly casted famous ones. Paul Bettany remains the same character from The DaVinci Code, Dennis Quaid should not be a hillbilly and Lucas Black should have given up his career after Tokyo Drift.

My major problem with the film however was the story. In all honesty, it was like reading a letter addressed to someone else sent from someone I don’t know. I don’t understand the context of the letter, the purpose of it or even where the story is going to end up later on.

On the plus side – great special effects. That grandma was the most kick-ass demon I have ever seen since Daria in Night Watch (A Russian Film).

Is this film worth seeing?

No.

Is it worth ranting about?

Clearly.

- Written by Ethan Taylor